5 months!!

My sweet Claire Lula turned 5  months old yesterday. 5 months old. I say this every month, but I absolutely cannot get over how quickly time is passing by. 

She grows & changes so much every day. I love it & hate it at the same time. Time needs to slow down.

 I simply do not have the words to express how much I love this girl. It's indescribable. I know I am preaching to the choir, but I never in my life imagined loving a human being as much as I love Claire.

She still looks a lot like her daddy, but I can see the shape of my eyes coming out. She's also got my long limbs. I'm still holding out that she'll have my blue eyes, but they are looking more like hubb's hazel color. Who knows.

It's so hard to get her to smile for pictures now! She used to cheese it up as soon as she saw the camera & now it's the opposite! She sees the camera & the smile disappears. She definitely gets that from her dad. 

Here's what the Lu is up to:

*She's still in size 1 diaps.

*Eats 5 oz of breast milk every 3 hours. Waiting to start solids until after her surgery in March.

*Wears 3-6 month tops.

*0-3month bottoms.

*Rolls from back to belly & belly to back. When she wants.

*She's definitely an assisted sitter. 

*Has zero interest in bearing weight on her hands during tummy time.

*Loves to "stand". Maybe she'll skip crawling all together? Hehe. 

*Sleeps from 7-7 in her crib. Wakes up occasionally at 4am to eat. 

*Reaches & tries to grab everything. & then it goes straight to the mouth. Namely her feet.

*No signs of teeth.

*Has discovered fake coughing to get attention. So funny.

*Responds to her name & looks for us when she hears our voices. 

* Loves music & books

& yes. i'm still exclusively pumping. Go me ;)

One thing I have noticed, the older & smarter Claire gets, is that she is getting "bored" with her usual toys, i.e. her playmat. She lasts maybe 10 minutes on there these days before getting bored. 

Those with babes around Claire's age, what have you found that keeps your little one entertained? She does love her jumperoo, but I can't just have her sit in that all day! I feel like I need to find some other little things she can keep herself busy with. She also gets bored with me pretty quickly, too. HA!

I think that pretty much sums her up for month 5. omg. She's going to be a half year old before I know it.  Time, please stop slow down!!

Thank you for all of the responses to my previous post! I definitely can't complain about not having anything to read now! I am going to work on following all of you! So don't worry! 

I'm confused!

So I was catching up on all of my blogs tonight & noticed that on most of the blogs on my roll, I'm not even a follower. 

What the hell?

 I swear that I have clicked "follow" on all of the blogs I read, but apparently not. 

So, do me a favor. 

If you follow me & would like me to follow you if I don't already, shoot me a comment! 

I feel stupid for even doing this! But I want to make sure you know that I love you all! 

Thanks so much ;)

Please bear with me.

This week has been a doozie.  

I'm not going to sugar coat it- Reality sucks sometimes.

Being an adult & worrying about adult things sucks sometimes, too.

I'm in the process of getting my head out of my ass bucking up, so bear with me.

I'll be back to my "normal" blogging schedule hopefully next week.

Anytime I need to put things in perspecitve,

I just need to look at this sweet face & thank God for her.

AND, she'll be 5 months on Sunday. So not cool :)

My {not so secret} addiction.

I've told you all before about my terrible addiction to Starbucks. I've always loved a good Starbucks iced latte, but when I got pregnant, I suddenly could not stand the smell or taste of coffee in general. This was a good thing. A very good thing. "What an easy way to quit my addiction", I thought to myself!

When I had Claire, I still didn't have a great interest in coffee; but the sleepless nights were catching up with me & I knew I had to bring it back into my life. I started out with just making my own coffee at home for the first couple of months. Which was nothing special & saved us a shit ton of money.

But then, somewhere between October & now, I have re-kindled my love for Starbucks in a very, very sickening way. It started out as an innocent Venti Iced Latte here & there. Nothing major. & then, as maternity leave came to a close, it became an everyday essential. Every morning, people. I would drive my heiny to the nearest Starbucks, order my Venti Non-fat Iced Vanilla Latte & $4.80 later, I would be on my merry way. It became so bad, that even on days I didn't work, I would pack up the babe & drive there to get my daily fix.

My name is Lauren, and I have a {serious} addiction to Starbucks.

As the $5.00 a day transactions dwindled from our bank account, I knew I had to get a grip on this bad habit before it gets even more out of hand {as if that's possible}.

So, when my birthday rolled around & hubby asked me what I wanted {within reason}, I said an espresso maker! That would solve all of my problems! I could just make my lattes from home!Simple!

Well, not quite. When I hopped on my favorite website, Amazon & researched Espresso Machines, I was quickly saddened to find they were hundreds of dollars {but you're probably thinking to yourself, psshh-she spends at least $100.00 a month on Starbucks, anyway}.

After hours of research, I realized that to make an iced latte, I don't need a big fancy machine. I just need a simple contraption that will make the espresso.

So, I decided on this little guy:



Bialetti Moka Express Stovetop



                                                    
It makes 6- 2oz shots of Espresso. That's all I need! & it was $30.00. I was so happy when realized that I just needed something simple!

I also ordered one of these little plastic tumblers to make it feel more like Starbucks. I think it was like $5.00. A re-usable cup for the price of ONE COFFEE. That's sad. 

So, when I got my little espresso brewer/maker & tumbler from Amazon on Thursday, I was so excited to make my latte come Friday morning! Well, to make a very long story short, I made my drink on Friday morning...it tasted and looked like poop water. No joke. It was disgusting. I was so bummed. But determined to make this work!

So yesterday, {I relapsed over the weekend. Go figure} I waltzed into Starbucks & asked the nice little barista to tell me what I needed to make my own Starbucks Iced Latte. She told me exactly how to make it. She even sold me the vanilla syrup they use AND a pump!

So I bought this:

And this: specifically ground for espresso. I bought this exact stuff from Wal-Mart on Thursday, but it was ground for coffee and not espresso. No wonder it tasted like poop!

So, operation Kick Starbucks Addiction to the Curb commenced this morning & I am pleased to announce that my Non-Fate Iced Vanilla Latte tasted  just. like. Starbucks.

Here's what I spent:

$30.00 on Espresso maker 

$5.00 on plastic tumbler

$8.00 on a liter of vanilla syrup

$10.00 on a 12oz bag of ground espresso 

Total: $53 {ish}

All of these will  last me a while!!

Not even the total of what I would have spent in one month on my daily trip to S-bucks. How sad is that?

Now let's see if I can keep this up...

ETA: How silly of me not to tell you how to make these after all of that!

If you want to make a 16oz. Latte, you need:

*4-5 pumps of the syrup of your choice

*3 shots of freshly brewed espresso

*about 1/4 cup of non-fat milk {I just eye-ball it}

*ice

First pump syrup into your cup. Add shots of espresso & milk. Add the amount of ice to your liking, stir & ENJOY!

Today was one of *those* days.

You know, the kind where everything shitty happens in a matter of hours?


If you follow me on Twitter, you probably already know how my day has gone. 


I woke up in a great mood. I have Wednesdays off, so I was excited to spend it with Claire Lu. And then, I remembered I committed to work from home from 2-5. ugh. There goes my good mood.


After dropping the doggie off at the groomer's & listening to Claire whine the entire way, I thought it would be nice to drown my feelings in a bacon, egg & cheese biscuit from Mickey Dee's (don't judge). 'Twas delicious if you must know. 


We get home, I feed the babe & pump & she protests her nap. Figures, since she's been napping amazing all week & the one day I need her on a decent schedule, she refuses. 


Noon thirty rolls around & I realize I should probably go to the grocery store, since all we have in the house is some moldy cheese & chinese leftovers from Friday. So, I pack up the whiney babe & make my way to the grocery store. 


I pull into the grocery store parking lot. Claire is screaming. I decide it's not worth it trying to take her in there all upset. So, I opt to drive thru Mickey D's instead. Again. 


Go pick up the pup from groomers, only to find she has been sitting in the kennel, in her own feces for God knows how long. I'm shocked, pissed & upset {& so is the dog}. Worst $80 I've ever spent. I mean, she looks adorable, but she smells like poop & who knows how horribly they treated her. I guess I should have gotten the hint when I called to make an appointment yesterday & got her in today!
{note to self. report to BBB}.


I Get home. Feed babe. Pump. Attempt to put her down for nap. FAIL. 


1:30pm: Put babe in jumperoo, turn on Playhouse Disney (again, don't judge. OK. Judge if you want. I don't care). 


1:45-5pm: Pure Chaos. 


Now? Claire is in bed after crying for 3 hours straight from being overly tired & I am on my second glass of wine. Cheers.


ETA: Sorry this post is spaced so weird. I'm not technologically advanced enough to figure out why, but it's sort of obnoxious. 

ANSWERS Part II

Here are the second half of the questions & answers {finally}.

Thanks again to everyone who participated!

Katie @ Chronicles of KT asked:
I have a question... I am 20 weeks pregnant and we will be registering soon, I was wondering what are your top 5 things you don't think you could live without as a new mom to a lil one also what are/ if any the things you have or received that you thought you would use or love and don't? This is a GREAT question. I most definitely have some favorites:
*Claire's play gym. Ever since we have brought her home from the hospital, she has loved this. It entertains her for quite a while, which gives me a chance to get things done around the house
* My Balboa sling. I LOVE this thing. I didn't receive a carrier for any of my showers, nor did I register for one. Why? I didn't know if Claire would be a fan of them. When she was a couple of weeks old, and wanted to be held ALL. THE. TIME. I knew we had to do something about it. I took her to Babies R' Us & put her in the Baby Bjorn. She hated it. I think because she just hung there & wasn't curled up in anything. So I tried a sling on & stuck her in it & she loved it. She still loves it. I stick her in there when she is having a particularly needy day & I'm able to get things done.
* Summer Infant SwaddleMe aka, the baby straight jacket. This is something that Claire isn't able to fall asleep without. She HAS to be swaddled in order to fall asleep at night & I love this because it is so secure & doesn't come undone like a regular receiving blanket might. This is a MUST HAVE in our house
* My Medela Swing breast pump. This thing is my third arm. I take it everywhere with me since I exclusively pump & it works amazing. It's small. Nothing over the top but gets the job done. If you're planning on breastfeeding, I would definitely invest in one of these. Most insurance companies will even reimburse you for them!
* Claire's favorite time of day is bath time. Love is an understatement. So, we couldn't have bath time without her Whale Bathtub. This is something that I registered for based on the raving reviews. Love it.

A couple of things that I registered for & received but don't use are the Bumbo & The Little Lamb Seat. I'm so bummed because these two things have great reviews & are great products, but they are things that Claire just doesn't enjoy.

From the beginning, she never liked her Little Lamb seat. She much preferred her Little Lamb Swing, because she liked to move, & still does. She tolerates the Bumbo, but won't sit in it for a long period of time without getting frustrated & wanting to get out. BOO! But that's not to say your little one won't like either of these things!

Britt asked:
What are some of your favorite blogs to read? Honestly, all of the blogs on my "blog roll" are favorites of mine. If you have any fave's, send them my way! I LOVE reading blogs.
Being a mom, we don't get much "alone time." What do you do to have a little mommy time and keep your sanity? :) I like this question. There are a few things I need in my everyday life to keep my sanity. The main one being my Starbucks fix. Everyday. This is an absolutely horrible habit that I HAVE to break. In fact, I am planning on buying a cheap espresso maker so that I can make my own lattes. But I look forward to my morning caffeine fix everyday. It keeps me going. Internet & T.V time everyday is also a must. I need my daily dose of blog, Dr. Phil & Oprah, even if I record them & watch them later. The other thing is that I need to be clean & have a little bit of make-up on everyday, even if I am at home with Claire. Having a shower with a bit of make-up makes me feel happy & refreshed. Weird, but true.
You said a little bit ago that your sexual drive went out the window... (I think 90% of us can relate with you!) how is hubbs handling it? Any spicy ideas you've found that we all need to know about???!
HAHA!! I wish. If you have any ideas, send them my way, because I am seriously lacking in the intimacy department. BAD. The only thing that helps me get "into it" is a couple glasses of wine & some sexy music. If I have these two things, it brings my inner vixen out...haha. Kidding. Kinda.
How did your daughter get to be so damn cute?! (this isn't a question... just had to put it out there for you!)
Aww, thanks. I am biased, but I think so, too!

Jessica @ The Southern Belle Baby asked:

What is your favorite thing about motherhood so far? Gosh, this is a tough question because I want to be cliche & say that everything is my favorite thing about motherhood. I guess just the fact that this little life is dependent on me to meet her needs & I'm so lucky & fortunate to get to do that.

What is your idea of a perfect date with your husband? If you would have asked me this before Claire was here, I would have said going on a little vacation, having some drinks & letting loose. Now? My perfect date would be going to a nice dinner & coming home & vegging out on the couch. My, how a child changes your idea of "perfect".
How did the hubs propose to you?
It was June 23rd, 2007 & he was supposedly out of town on business. My parents were throwing a "summer bbq" for friends. While at home with everyone, the doorbell rang. My mom told me to go answer it. Who was it? My boyfriend! He walked inside & handed me a book of love poems. He told me to open it & inside, all of the pages were cut out into the shape of a heart. The ring box sat inside that heart. As I opened it, he got down on one knee, in front of all of our friends & asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. It was amazing, if I do say so myself.
right after he popped the question.

we were 19. Babies!

Jeannie asked:

In your opinion, what's the biggest surprise about motherhood? Probably the fact that everything came so naturally to me. This was one of my biggest fears when I was pregnant. I worried that I would have no clue what to do with a baby. Everyone always told me that my instincts would just kick in & they were right. Granted, it took a good month for things to feel natural, but sure enough they did & I was pleasantly surprised!

Mrs. G asked:

Hardest part of motherhood so far? Definitely adjusting to the lack of sleep you get. I have always been one who needs 9+ hours of sleep in order to function properly & I knew it was going to be a hard adjustment. Hell, I'm still getting used to it.
Do you have many IRL mom friends? (I don't, I need to find a playgroup or something) One word: No. It's really sad, actually. I have 2 good friends. Both of which are moms & only one of them lives in the same state as me. I've actually been feeling really down about this lately. The fact that I really don't have many friends. I've been thinking about enrolling Claire in some Little Gym classes or taking to her to the library for story time & making some friends there. Now I just need to get the guts to do it. HA.
Did you do any sleep training with C?
I explained a little in Claire's 4 month post that we just started the Ferber Method of sleep training with her. We've refined it a little bit to make it a little "kinder" & so far, so good. The past 2 nights, she has gone to sleep on her own with zero fussing & has slept until 5:30am!!! & just for the record, the recommended age to start this is 4-6 months. We felt like Claire was ready to begin this & would certainly not have begun it if we didn't feel like she could handle it. Ok, I'm going to quit justifying it...hehe

Stephanie & Ryan asked:

When you were pregnant what did you do to keep yourself calm and not anxious? In the beginning, I was nothing but anxious. Back in the early days of pregnancy, I worried constantly. Because of the scare I had, I really had no choice BUT to worry. Towards the middle of my second trimester, I was very relaxed. I'm not really sure how I did it, I guess just knowing Claire was inside me & she was safe & healthy made me very relaxed. I really started to itch in the 3rd trimester. I just wanted to her be here already!! But I wish I hadn't had been so anxious. I wish I would've just calmed down & enjoyed my time with just my husband & I, because we haven't had alone time like that since I was pregnant! Does that even make sense?

What are some challenges you face as a new Mom that you didn't expect to face? Really the one & only {big} issue with the baby that I didn't expect to face is dealing with all of the struggles Claire has with her cleft pallet. Everything we've had issues with thus far stems from that. Obviously when I was pregnant, we had no clue she would be born with this, so it was not something I couldn't prepared myself for.

As for issues with myself, I didn't expect to have the Baby Blues as long as I did. I knew that most new moms suffered from them for a good 2 weeks, but mine lasted for a month & I was absolutely miserable. I should/will do a whole post on this. I think it would be good for me to talk about the struggles I went through...

Maria asked:

How did you cope with the day you actually placed Claire in daycare? My baby boy is still baking in the oven, but this is something I constantly dread...the day I place in the arms of someone else. I am very fortunate in the fact that Claire does not have to go to daycare. I work 3 days out of the home & my mom watches Claire 2 days & my mother-in-law watches Claire the other day. I am so lucky to have the grandmas watch her! But, that's not to say it wasn't hard going back to work & leaving her. Even leaving Claire with my own mom was so hard for me. Not because I didn't trust her, but because I wasn't there to take care of her.

Up until I went back to work, hubby & I were her only care takers. She had never been watched by anyone else & that freaked me out! I had a million "what-if's" going through my head for those first couple of weeks, but after that? It got so much easier. Seeing her little face when I walked through that door at the end of the day made me feel O.K.

Lindsey asked:
What is your favorite pair of shoes you own? Pictures please!! THESE {sorry, not the best picture} are my most favorite shoes/boots ever! They are patent leather boots by Steve Madden that I bought for a pretty penny a few years ago. I wear them ALL. THE. TIME in the fall/winter & I have definitely gotten my money's worth.

Also, what is one thing you had to learn the hard way growing up that you hope Claire doesn't have to?
Gosh, this is a great question. I have touched on this in posts before that depression runs in my family, however; when I was younger & developed it, I didn't know what it was or why I was feeling it. It was something that I was ashamed of & hid from my parents {and everyone for that matter} for a while, until they finally caught on.

I can only hope that Claire doesn't have to hide what she is feeling from anyone, ESPECIALLY her parents. I want her to know that anything & everything she feels is O.K. and natural & not to fight it.

Mrs. Lexi asked:
What do love and hate most about where you live? I love the scenery, I often find myself taking the beautiful mountains for granted. & I also love that we have a change of seasons & it's not hot or cold all year round. The thing I hate about living here? The ridiculous dominate religious views. everything is focused around the LDS faith & that DRIVES ME NUTS....that's as far as I'm going to go. I don't want to get my big mouth into trouble ;)
If you could move anywhere else, where would it be? Honestly? Probably Canada. HAHA! I have never been, but I have heard nothing but wonderful things about it. Not to mention they have amazing health care benefits :P

Well. There you have it. I hope I answered all of your questions to your liking & that they make some sort of sense!

4 Months {& err...3 weeks}

4.5 months. Seriously?

Ok, so I am totally slacking on Claire's 4 month post. But in my defense, her well check-up wasn't until last Friday & I wanted to wait & post her stats when I got them:

Weight: 11lbs 4oz. {10th percentile} At least little tiny is gaining weight! Stupid cleft pallet.
Height: 25" {75th percentile}
Diapers: Size 1
Clothes: 0-3months & some 3-6month onesies & has outgrown most of her footed 0-3mo jammies ::tear:: ::sniff::
Milestones: Officially rolling over from back to tummy every chance she gets., grabs everything & puts it directly in her mouth. Recognizes mom & dad & our voices. Developing stranger anxiety (crazy). She's also begun the early stages of teething. No teeth or buds yet, though
Eats: 4-5oz of breast milk {via bottle} every 3 hours
Sleep: still waking up 3-4x a night. Two of those times, we feed her. ::crosses fingers she will go back to her 12hr stretches soon:: However, she did surprise us last night & only woke up once!!

Loves: bath time, her play gym, grabbing hair, books, Playhouse Disney & Yo Gabba Gabba

Dislikes: sleep, getting her nose & throat suctioned {but who does?!}, her glider in her room, tummy time {but tolerates it}, people with dark brown/black hair. HAHA!

At her appointment on Friday, I was explaining to the doctor how frustrated/worried we were at bedtime because Claire would not take her last bottle of the day. We knew she was hungry, but every time we tried to feed her, she would just scream & refuse her bottle.

The doctor laughed an said "well, it sounds like Claire has what I like to call Smart Baby Syndrome. She knows at bedtime, you take her in her room & feed her & she doesn't like that because she knows she has to go to bed." Well I'll be damned! The more I thought about it, the more it made sense. The minute we would sit down in her glider, she would begin to fuss & start to scream if we even tried to feed her.

So, on Friday night; we gave her a bath & went into the living room to give her, her last bottle. And wouldn't you know she chugged the entire thing without a fight & went straight to sleep when we put her down in her crib. We successfully tricked our "smart baby"!

Speaking of sleep, we've also begun The Ferber Method of sleep training per our pediatrician's recommendation. I know this is a controversial subject & I was weary of it myself, but something had to be done & it made me more comfortable knowing our pedi gave us the O.K.

This method is essentially teaching our baby to fall asleep on her own, without depending on us or the bottle. I was afraid she would just cry & cry when we tried to put her to bed. But she seriously surprised the hell out of us on Friday when we started it. She fussed for about 5 minutes after we put her down. I went & gave her the binky & let her know I was there & she fell right asleep. When she woke up throughout the night, all we had to do was the same thing & she would go right back to sleep.

Go ahead & judge me for letting my child fuss herself to sleep, but it's what works for us.

I'd say that so far, so good with this sleep training. I'm glad we've got some sort of method going because I hated just flying by the seat of our pants when it came to the nighttime craziness.

Also, thank you so much for your recommendations on my diaper debacle. I ended up grabbing a pack of Target's Up & Up brand the other day. I loved them...until they started giving little miss diaper rash :( so it looks like I've got to stick with my Pampers Baby Dry. I ordered 252 from Amazon Mom last night & will be getting them tomorrow. Score!