Sometimes, "Me Time" is a Necessity.

I didn't like last Friday. It was a weird day to begin with & I felt like a dark cloud hung over my head all day long. Not to mention the week felt like it drug on & on.


It was difficult to get out of bed & get moving. I just wanted to crawl back under the covers & not deal with anything. {I sort of miss those days every now & then where I could do that}


I held back tears as Dallas left for work, fearing that I wouldn't be able to handle Claire on my own. Fearing that I'd have to call him home from work again. {that's a whole other post}


For some reason, I just felt defeated from the moment I opened my eyes. Feeling overwhelmed by every little thing. I guess it didn't help that I slept horribly the night before. Little sleep + me= not good.


The first thing I thought when I felt those heavy feelings was, "Oh my God, please do not let this be my depression peaking. I do not have the time or energy to deal with it!"


As the day moved forward, I pushed myself to get through it & be strong. Shove those negative feelings to the side & focus on being a happy momma. But you know what? Sometimes that doesn't always work. Sometimes you can't always pretend everything is ok when it really isn't. Sometimes you need a break.


I called my mom when she got off work. She knew something was up. "I'm just in a funk today & need to get out of the house." So, we met at the mall. Surely shopping would cheer me up! Wrong. I had zero desire to shop once we got in the mall. In fact, I cried while we were in Express. No clue why. Probably because a single shirt was $39.95 & shit if I could afford that. HA!


Driving home from the mall, I broke down & had a little pity party for myself. I hate when I have pity parties, so pathetic. I called D & just whined. "I don't know why I feel like this. I just DON'T KNOW!" After asking if I had been taking my meds, he said "You need a break". A break from being a mom." 


WHAT? But, he was right. As much as I hated to admit it, I needed a break. Time to myself & nobody else. But why did I feel so incredibly guilty for admitting that? I AM A MOM! I can't take a break from that!! 


But I did. And it felt so good. Saturday, my amazing husband surprised me by telling me I was going to the Lady GaGa concert that night. "You need to go & unwind, I'll stay home with Lu".


He melts my heart, that man.


So, Saturday night I got all prettied up, which is SO rare & {semi-reluctantly} went to the concert with D's mom & little sister. {I felt guilty leaving. I don't know why. Claire was already in bed by the time I left.}

I look pissed. But I really was excited!

And? It was a lot of fun. That Lady GaGa is a freak. 


Also, I got to sleep in until 10 yesterday. It was glorious & I feel like a whole new woman {& mom} today.


Sometimes, it's ok to take a break. Right? Right?!